There’s a great quote I read once from a blues guitar legend, I think it was Buddy Guy. He said something along the lines of, “If I don’t play for one day, I can hear the difference in my performance. If I don’t play for two, everyone can hear it.”
It really struck me. Here is one of the best guitarists in the world, who has influenced and inspired a slew of other legends including Eric Clapton, saying that after over 50 years of playing at that high of a level, a measly two day break can make him feel rusty.
It may sound extreme, but the truth is, I get it. I went back into my studio to start painting again last week after the better part of a month away from it. I was a flurry of activity preparing for my last art show and wanted to take a break to work on some new music. But I got the opportunity to show again at the LA Brewery Artwalk in a couple weeks, so I needed to make some new visual work.
I had a couple of small ideas roaming around in my head, but nothing great. No real direction. No grand statement I wanted to make. Dusty, lifeless paint containers sat on the shelf in my studio, staring at me. Even the fluorescent colors seemed dead. Everything I laid down looked terrible. I had no good ideas, and I couldn’t execute.
I didn’t know what to do. I found myself beginning to avoid my studio just to save myself from feeling that quiet failure. I wanted to crawl into bed and wait for my skills to return. But I know better.
Experience has taught me to keep going. If I’ve got nothing, then make crap. It’s ok. I don’t have to show it to anyone. I think it takes courage to knowingly make crap. It takes courage to create something brilliant too. Perhaps that is the most important element in creativity. To expose something I’m not sure how you’ll respond to. To create something personal, that isn’t specifically engineered from the ground up to evoke an adoring response from a faceless public. Lightning isn’t safe. But it’s beautiful, electric and very exciting. And that’s what good art is.
I spend a lot of my time these days bouncing back and forth between painting, music, graphic design work (helps keep the lights on), and trying to have some semblance of a social life. So the ability to dive deep into and out of various projects is a skill I seriously need to hone.
I haven’t completely found my groove yet. But I have discovered, that I can only do one thing at a time. Trying to simultaneously work on 7 different projects only makes for craziness, paralysis and mediocrity. Real creativity takes focused, applied pressure. Even if that applied pressure has to come in bursts.
The good news is, no matter how much in the moment, I think “it” is dead and gone forever, it never really is. It may take a minute for me to get sharp again, but nothing is ever lost. No skill or experience. It all goes into the subconscious and only needs a little coercing to come back out to play. Two days ago I still felt rusty, staring at a piece of burlap and some plywood. Today it’s almost a piece of art. And by tomorrow, it will be a piece of art.
As to whether it’s crap or not, time tends to be the best judge of such things so I’m not going to worry about it. My plan is to work until it feels good, label it “finished,” and move on.
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